Thursday, February 15, 2007

Project Runway Recap, Season Two, Episode 2: Please destroy your most treasured garments for our entertainment!

The boys at Project Rungay are blogging season two on DVD while we wait for season four to begin. So I've decided to do recaps again. It is very different from re-watching season one because season two is still so fresh in my mind and, unlike season one, I already felt like I was part of a blogging community over on Blogging Project Runway when I watched it the first time. This makes it a little harder to come up with new things to say but I'll do my best.

We start the episode with the designers moving into the Atlas apartments. For some reason they are divided by gender, although, as John from Top Design would point out, they are all just a bunch of girls anyway. We learn a few random bits of information about the designers:

Nick: "My father was a diplomat. Long story short, that's why I'm interested in fashion design."

Santino: "I'm going to be the Shakespeare of fashion!"

Daniel Franco: "Rasputin was the Che Guevara of Russia. That's why I have his face on my T-shirt."

Does anyone ever know what Daniel Franco is talking about?

Zulema: "I don't believe in fairness. Fairness is for pussies. Now, get your ratty-ass clothes out of my closet, bitches!"

Andrae: "I, sniff, my own, sniff, little boutique, sob, sniff, sniff, emotional year for me, sniff, sob, so happy, sniff, but also sad, sniff, no, I said I wasn't going to cry, sniff, sniff, means so much to me, waaahhhh!"

What?

Then we are subjected to some terrible editing and we are back in the studio, in a scene that was clearly shot right after the last episode's judging segment. Everyone is wearing the same clothes from the last episode even though we just saw them in different clothes at the Atlas.

They are picking out models:

Heidi: "These will be your models for the rest of the competition."

Nick: "Liar!"

Then we are back at the Atlas watching the designers pick out their best clothes to go to a party. Diana puts on her prom dress:

Diana: "I get all my fashion tips from Popular Science Magazine."

Chloe: "Someone hold her down while I give her a makeover."

So everyone is getting drunk and partying and then Tim makes a shocking announcement:

Tim: "OK, everyone, we're going to have to ask you all to strip naked and put your clothes in these bags. You will be provided with towels to wear back to the Atlas. Tomorrow you have to design a new outfit out of the clothes you are wearing tonight. You can only use the materials you are wearing right now. You won't even be provided with thread; you'll need to unravel the thread from your clothes and use that."

Andrae is imitating Tim in an exaggerated British accent:

Andrae: "Rather! Look at me, I say, I'm Tim Gunn; I'm absolutely gobsmacked over this next challenge. You all need to put your jumpers, frocks, knickers, macs and trainers into one of these bin liners. Cheerio!"

Tim: "Why is he talking like that? I'm not British."

The designers have different strategies:

Emmett: "I'm going to just stare at my clothes for hours because without a concept all the cutting and draping in the world is futile."

Zulema: "Concept is a waste of time. Just cut, you pussy!"

Andrae: "The most important thing is intention. The judges need to be able to determine your intention. Kirsten, what is your intention?"

Kirsten: "I'm intending to strangle you if you don't stop saying 'intention' and start giving me some more useful advice."

Tim: "Kirsten, I'm just not sure what your intention is with this top."

Kirsten: "AAARGH!!!"

Tim: "What did I say?"

Time is up and many of the designers are not anywhere close to being finished. Emmett, of course, finished hours ago, despite the fact that he spent most of the time just staring at his clothes. Basically, since he is 8 feet tall, he just took his shirt and turned it into a dress. I don't know how innovative it is but it's pretty enough.

Emmett: "I can't believe I'm the only one who finished. I guess I win by default!"

This is where Emmett learns that when Tim says you have to finish by midnight, it doesn't actually mean you have to be finished by midnight; you'll have a few hours the next morning.

Emmett: "That sucks."

Daniel Franco: "The problem is that my level of quality is just so much higher than everyone else's; I can't be expected to finish in the same amount of time."

The designers line up like that scene in Airplane to take their turn beating the crap out of Daniel Franco.

The next morning the rest of the designers finish their garments while Emmett helps Andrae sew his model into his dress. Emmett becomes my favorite.

The legendary DVF joins Michael, Nina, and Heidi to judge the runway. They love Santino's, Chloe's, and Daniel Franco's. I think I have to agree. Daniel Franco's is very well made, if not quite finished. His tailoring skills show and the design is pretty and completely different from his original outfit. Santino's is costumey and strange but I find the way he turned his jacket into a skirt to be really clever and beautiful in it's own way. Chloe's is clever and beautiful and well made, and completely wearable. I'm not sure why she kept going on about not having as much to work with as other people when she had a dress and jacket, but it was very impressive that she took those two elements and made it look like the fabrics were made to go together. She wins! Congratulations, Chloe!

How did Emmett do? Emmett's is, of course, flawless, pretty and wearable but I just don't think he changed it that much from a shirt. Diana's is also pretty but not very innovative.

Apparently Zulema, Kirsten, and Andrae are at the bottom. Zulema's is too short, Kirsten's is too trashy, and Andre's looks slightly unfinished. They defend their garments:

Zulema: "I compensated for my model's hunchback but I didn't factor in her gigantic butt."

Judges: "You're right; her ass is huge. It's not your fault at all. You're in."

Andrae: "This garment has a lot of personal meaning for me. The transformation of my old American denim into this updated version of a traditional Chinese qipao represents my Asian-American heritage and also the recent changes in my life."

Judges: "Andrae, thank you for that concise and moving explanation. You're in."

Kirsten is out.

Andrae: "That sucks. I really liked her!"

Yeah, yeah. We all loved her. She was great.

Kirsten had a beautiful scarf that really could have helped her outfit:

Kirsten: "I couldn't use the scarf because it was my grandmother's."

Nina: "No one asked you to destroy the scarf."

Exactly. Kirsten kept acting like she had to cut up the scarf but she could have just used it as it was. In fact, in the interview afterwards, Kirsten is actually wearing that scarf as a top. In fairness to her, I think anything used in the outfit would have become the property of Bravo. Whether the designers or Nina knew that at the time, I don't know.

Anyway, before we say goodbye to Kirsten, Michael Kors has one more question for her:

Michael: "Would you wear that outfit?"

Kirsten: "Do I look like a whore?"

5 comments:

Anonymous said...

Eric, you are a riot. Thank you for brightening my day - I'm looking forward to your next post!

Anonymous said...

Great ending. Do I look like a whore?

The questions was: Did Kirsten want the win badly enough?

Not.

TLo said...

"Heidi: "These will be your models for the rest of the competition."

Nick: "Liar!"


ROFL. You fabulous bitch!

kora in hell said...

Diana: "I get all my fashion tips from Popular Science Magazine."

This would explain a lot.

Zulema: "I compensated for my model's hunchback but I didn't factor in her gigantic butt."

Judges: "You're right; her ass is huge. It's not your fault at all. You're in."


Hunchback. I'm dying.

bungle said...

I think it is pretty clear that this blog is where the coolest and smartest hang out. Anon 8:54, ms. 1st Place, thegaygods, and the amazing Kora (trixie)... they, partying with eric3K at his joint, create something of a VIP room of the best club around.


At least that's how it was 'til I showed up.

:D