Friday, October 02, 2009

Project Runway Season Six, Episode Seven: Pumpkin Pie in the Sky!

OK, why was this episode called "The Sky is the Limit"? Because someone mentioned parachute fabric? Because the judges are always high? I'm going with a pie in the sky reference because some model trainer calls all the models "Pumpkin Pie" so he can tell them apart. I know it's a stretch.

Last week Fatma was out! I'd like to pause for a moment of prayer:

Dear Gott in Himmel, please let Vanessa get an Arby's commercial so Fatma can come back. Amen.

Back at the hotel, Gordana is comparing the designers to Olympic athletes:

Gordana: "So you know how some of the athletes are taking steroids or are genetically men? Yeah, it's just like that."

The few remaining guys start the He-Man Woman Haters Club and the first order of business is to eliminate Shirin. Second order of business: Logan: is he or isn't he?

Heidi makes her weekly pointless announcement:

Heidi: "Hello designers. I can't tell you anything about the next challenge. Go ask your father."

Tim introduces some Macy's lady:

Tim: "I'm pleased to introduce some Macy's lady."

Macy's Lady: "Your challenge is all about color. And at Macy's you can buy clothes in any color you want as long as it's blue. The great thing about blue is that it comes in many shades, which makes it different from other colors that only come in one shade. You'll be designing for the INC brand so make sure your designs are appropriate."

Tim: "Wow, it's going to be challenging to design something that boring but I have faith in all of you. The winner will have his or her design sold at Macy's."

Christopher: "My dream is to walk down the street and point at a girl and say 'I made that.'"

Well, I think that's a very misogynistic way to refer to your sexual conquests.

Christopher: "I'm talking about the dress she would be wearing."

Oh. That makes a lot more sense.

They make their design pitches to the Macy's lady:

Althea: "I wanted to do a high-waisted denim look that would be appropriate for the office or for attending a monster truck rally."

Carol Hannah: "I wanted to make a dress that would fit into a woman's existing wardrobe. So I made it really flat so it wouldn't take up much space in the closet."

Logan: "I'm doing a sweater dress."

Shirin: "Yeah, what he said."

Epperson: "I noticed that the INC label had a significant lack of ruffled capes."

Nicolas: "I have one word for you: Vest! I can tell you're speechless."

Christopher: "A day to evening shirt dress."

Louise: "Dresses plastered with flowers and other crap."

Gordana: "First, I just have to say that I'm a huge fan of boring clothes."

Irina: "My first look will be a patchwork skirt and then for the second look I thought I would make something that a woman would actually wear."

It's a team challenge. The team leaders are Irina, Althea, Carol Hannah, Christopher, and Louise, which is not a good start for the He-Man Woman Haters Club. The team leaders pick their teammates:

Irina picks Gordana
Althea picks Logan
Carol Hannah picks Shirin
Christopher picks Epperson
Louise picks Nicolas

The teams have twenty minutes and $100 at mood. In a Project Runway first, Louise almost loses her money:

Tim: "It was so dramatic! Louise couldn't find the envelope with the money and then she looked around and then she finally found it! There's always some new zaniness going on with this show! This was almost as exciting as that time one of the designers lost a Barbie hat."

The teams are showing signs of stress:

Shirin: "We're making a sweater dress. That's not something I would ever make. Even though that's actually one of the ideas I pitched a few minutes ago."

Irina: "I'm just going to pretend that Gordana doesn't exist."

Nicolas: "Ruffles are so tacky! Can't we just cover everything in feathers?"

Epperson: "Christopher is such a genius. He's not like Qristyl at all. I am so psyched to be working with him!"

Christopher: "Oh, stop! Epperson is the genius! He suggested putting pockets on the shirt dress and that just rocked my world!"

Tim: "Oh, for god's sake! Would you two get a room?"

Michael Kors is back this week! Joining him will be someone new from Marie Claire and the Macy's lady.

Heidi: "One . . . OR MORE of you will be out. I'm seriously considering eliminating all of you. So watch your step, Pumpkin Pie!"

Irina and Gordana created a full dress with an empire waist and a skirt and blouse outfit. Both looks are perfectly boring enough to sell at Macy's.

Althea and Logan created a cute little suit with a skirt that was way too short and a second horrible look with weird blouse and a poorly-fitted pant that made the model look huge.

Louise and Nicolas created two dresses. One was light with dark fluffy trim and the other was dark with light ruffle trim. The first dress looked like a feather boa was stapled to the front. It was truly awful. The second look was better than the first, but that's not saying much.

Carol Hannah and Shirin created two more looks that were boring enough for the assignment. The first look was a high-waisted skirt with a blue top and the second was an unflattering garment that they are apparently calling a sweater dress, which they paired with black leggings.

Christopher and Epperson created a decent shirt dress and a second greenish bubble dress with a strange bib that was really bad and didn't have anything to do with the first look.

Irina and Gordana and Carol Hannah and Shirin were the top two teams.

Irina is the winner for her big striped dress. I guess it wasn't any worse than anything else on the runway this week. Congratulations, Irina.

Louise and Nicolas and Christopher and Epperson are the bottom two teams.

The judges hate Louise's ruffles. Heidi tells Nicolas that he is lucky he has immunity.

The judges hate both of Christopher's dresses. I hate the bubble dress with the bib but I'm surprised they hate the shirt dress so much. It wasn't great but it wasn't that bad.

Christopher and Louise are the bottom two and Heidi is as harsh as I've ever heard her:

Heidi: "Christopher, your dresses looked like they were designed by a blind crack whore. And Louise, your dresses made us all want to commit suicide."

Louise is out. Sorry Louise. You picked the wrong week to go tacky.

Tune in next week when Gordana auditions for the Blue Man Group.


Cliff O'Neill said...

I'm glad I'm not the ONLY person who thought Heidi was being unusually harsh.

And I liked the shirt dress. Even if the other outfit didn't have a thing to do with it.

Now, off to make some pumpkin pie, pumpkin pie.

kittens not kids said...

Heidi was NASTY NASTY NASTY this week. and the Macy's Woman was scary looking and acting. i didn't like her at all.

what puzzles me is that Professor Gunn quite liked Christopher & Epperson's work. Then the judges hated it. but who are the judges? a scary Macy's woman, and some blonde maybe-british tart from marie claire (does anyone read marie claire? i've never known anyone who does). and Heidi, who wears short, tight n shiny.

i will always trust Professor Gunn's opinion over the judges. ALWAYS.

also, i wanted to smack Althea for giggling so much when she picked Logan for her teammate. I am starting - unbelievable! - to feel sorry for Logan for being so pretty. It makes everyone around him act like a psycho or a moron or both.

kittens not kids said...

oh, and this was a really boring challenge with mostly-boring results. i HATED the dress irina made

MoHub said...

The oddest thing to me was Irina throwing Gordana under (on? over?) the bus when they were on the winning end. There was simply no need to do so, and Gordana was unbelievably cool and gracious under Irina's attack.

If I'd been Gordana, I'd have puched Irina's lights out right then and there.

David Dust said...

Excellent recap, Pumpkin Pie!!! :)


Sewing Siren said...

I don't know why the designers had such a problem with blue.
Of the 8 dresses, I saw grey, silver, black, cream, grey, white, lavender and very little blue.
Just make a damn blue dress ! That's all they had to do.

RJ Flamingo said...

Heidi was absolutely way over the top, this week. I think she's feeling the Nina-vaccuum.

All I can say is, no wonder I couldn't write a recap for the last 3 weeks until now - you sucked up all the mojo! Funniest recap I've read yet. Maybe I'll just refer all future recaps to you. :-D

eric3000 said...

Thanks, Pumpkin Pie, Pumpkin Pie, Pumpkin Pie, Pumpkin Pie, and Pumpkin Pie! I hope I'm not forgetting anyone!

Sewing Siren, I agree with you on the lack of blue. I'm never sure if the color on my television is off but the photos online confirm that there was more grey and green than there was blue. I don't know what the problem was.

Cliff O'Neill said...

"My hair is red, my eyes are green, my dress is vivid blue. ... If these colors don't look right to you, you're not seeing this on an RCA Color Television."

eric3000 said...

Ha ha! And my teeth should look ecru!

mumblesalot (Laura A) said...

I thought that was the saddest runway show yet. The green pumpkin should have been smashed. How he stayed on with that dress I will never know.

Oh that pumpkin pie guy with the models was too much. What an arrogant limp zucchini he was.

Tim is beginning to remind me of Jack Benny. (before your time?) particularly how he folds his one arm and rests his other hand on his face. He could be the classic straight guy in a comedy routine.

mumblesalot (Laura A) said...

P.S. My daughter is getting married next weekend so I won't be able to comment on your hysterical recap (I am having a psychic moment and predict your recap will be hysterical) but I will be reading along on my phone. So thanks in advance for all the laughter.

lovemesomelogan said...

Oh Pumpkin Pie, nothing about Logan wearing his good luck pants again this week? I'm sure he wore them just for you. And Althea, you've just been added to my hit list.

And what was up with nasty Heidi? Her clothes are 10 times worse than any of the items she lashed out at.

Loved Epperson's and Christopher's mutual admiration. Glad they are both still in.

I'm really hating on Irina. The judges obviously liked both looks and she still threw Gordana under the bus. WTF? How about giving Gordana credit for something? I think Gordana could really hurt her if she wanted to. I'm just sayin.

And LOL at your commnet about Nicolas hating ruffles when he is the prince of ticky tacky. As Heidi said, he's lucky he had immunity. But she's clearly had it with him, and Frau Seal always gets her way. He's so gone next week.

eric3000 said...

Laura A,

Congrats on your daughter's wedding! Have a great time! I hope she'll be wearing an Austin Scarlett original!

I tried to send you an email but I must have an old address.

ePastor James said...

Irina is a grand cuntess supreme, but I guess her dress was the least egregious creation. I was yelling at my TV for CH to win. She's adorable, and probably the nicest, sanest person there, with a sense of humor about herself. Althea was my #1 favorite, but I bumped her to #2 because of her occasional bosom-fitting woes. Either of them winning though would salvage this season--or Gordana as the "holy shit" winner. Irina winning would cause widespread swine flu.

Rankings, I guess:
-Carol Hannah

I forgot which ruffle dress is which, so whatever. Now that I'm done commenting, despite the fact that no one will ever read it =P, I look forward to next week's episode purely for your recap!

eric3000 said...

ePastor James,

Thanks for catching up on my past posts! Now you only have five other seasons to catch up on. Ha ha!